This Holy Week was one of the busiest ones that I have experienced so far. There was at least one activity that I was expected to be at every day, and these activities seemed to drain me, an introvert, off a great deal of energy. In addition to that, the heat was rather unbearable. As a result, I found myself exhausted so easily. Whenever I tried to sit down quietly to rest, pray, and reflect, there would be someone who came up and asked for something. Being a bit disconcerted, I thought to myself I should just join a religious community; there, I would have more time to pray and reflect.
Last night, I was on my way back from serving the Easter Vigil, dead tired, when some thoughts crossed my mind which seemed to infuse me with new strength. I suddenly recalled a young altar server who came up to me after the Good Friday Passion liturgy. He and I had a conversation about a year ago in which he told me he wanted to be a missionary when he grew up. His eyes showed a amazing determination that I was sure he would definitely be one. I told him to pray to the Blessed Mother every night with a Hail Mary so that she would help him fulfilling his dream. I also told him to say one Hail Mary for me every night. I since had forgotten about our conversation, until Friday when he rushed into the Sacristy to see me. His mother followed with a proud smile; she told me that he still prayed for me every single night. I was touched beyond telling.
I also recalled the meeting with a young friend who has been considering the possibility of joining the seminary. We had lunch. The conversation was great. I have great hope for him as he seems to be a gentle, kind, and lovable young man.
Then my mind suddenly cast back to the summer before I joined the seminary. I remembered the little boy with some serious heart conditions whom I met one day at my home parish where I was working. He was with his grandmother. I sat down and had a talk with her to find down that he came from a very troublesome family and his poor health had been preventing him from many activities, even from eating hard food. At the end of the conversation, I took off the miraculous medal I was wearing and gave it to the boy. He then handed a little pin which said WWJD, which stood for What Would Jesus Do. Then, all of the sudden, the boy dipped his finger into the baptismal fond and traced a sign of the cross on my forehead. It was his sending-off blessing for me. I still have the pin he gave me attached to the tie which I wear every Sunday for Mass at the seminary. It is a reminder for me to pray for the boy. It is also a reminder for me of what my vocation should be all about.
I then realized why the Lord wanted me to remember all these things that happened. Indeed, in the midst of the weariness and exhaustion of many works that I had to do; Christ wanted me to remember the reason why I chose to do the works and why I chose to live this life in the first place. It was, it is, and it will always be for the people of God.
Reflecting on this, I found myself serenely smiling and quietly telling the Lord: “Thank you for allowing me to live such a beautiful life.” And that night, I wrote in my journal, “Lord, as sinful and weak as I am, I love this life. I beg you to grant me the grace necessary to live it and remain faithful to it.”
I also came to understand more deeply what St. John Bosco meant when he said, “For you I study, for you I work, for you I live, and for you I am willing to give my life.” I want these words to be the motto of my life as well. It’s worth it all.
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