Although I try to stay clear of the
scholarly approach, my reflections, however, are often "homily oriented."
Today, for this beautiful Gospel from St. Mark, I wish to share a much more
personal reflection of one who seeks the vocation to life of service in Christ
Jesus.
“For the Son of Man did not come to be served,
but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
To the Blessed Mother,
Mother of All the Poor and the Oppressed
To My Mother
Who from My Early Childhood
Has Infused Me with Love for the Poor
And, to All My Brothers and Sisters
Who Have No Voice,
I Will Be Your Voice.
After all,
“For
You I Study, For you I Work,
For You I live,
For
You I Am Willing to Give My Life.”
St. John Bosco
These are the words of dedication
that I put in my under-grad thesis at St. John Vianney College Seminary. They
reflect my deepest desire to give myself to serve the Lord in the poor, the
destitute, the outcast, and the vulnerable. However, just as it took James and
John a long journey that ended up in many trials and suffering to learn what it
meant to drink the cup that Christ drank, so it did me to recognize the meaning
of my “yes” to the Lord…
As a teenager, briefly after my
returning to the Church, I became very interested in the priesthood. The
intention wasn’t as noble as one would expect it to be. The truth was I had
been watching videos of Pope John Paul II making Cardinals. Seeing how
awe-striking and impressive those Cardinals were, so, the 15 year-old Martin
proudly said, “I, too, want to be a Cardinal.”
No matter how silly and ignorant that
statement was, it was the start of a wonderful lesson of service the Lord had
prepared for me.
I entered the seminary as the
youngest in the house. Admittedly, I wasn’t the most humble seminarian there
was. Not that I was obnoxiously proud. However, I enjoyed attention and sought
to impress both my superiors and my peers. After all, I was only 17 and was quite
still immature.
As I continue journeying on this
path of Vocation, I was privileged to encounter many people from different
states and statuses of life. I was assigned to several different works. It was
then that I slowly found myself increasingly becoming more and more attracted
towards those who were underprivileged, who were oppressed, who were poor, and
most especially, those who were vulnerable and were with disabilities.
What changed?
I cannot be sure.
Perhaps, the many trials and
difficulties that God has allowed me to go through was a great contributing
factor. But, there ought to be more than that, it is a grace – a seed planted
by the Divine in my heart.
Whatever the case is, I feel so
much more connected with these folks and serving them brings me more joy than
any compliments or praises I have ever received. I am most content when I am
among those whom society often overlooks and neglects.
For the first time, I came to understand
what St. Paul meant when he said, “I have become all things for all people, so
that I may at least save some” (1 Cor. 9:22). To the homeless, I have become
like one among them (as once, one of my seminarian brothers pointed out that I
smelled like a homeless person after I returned from my pastoral work). To the
deaf, I have become like a deaf person in seeking to learn their language and
emerge into their culture. To the mentally handicapped, I have played with them
and joked with them as one of them (so much so that one of them actually
thought I belonged to the institution itself – is that a good thing?). To the
children, I have become like a kid (ask any of my friends who have seen me
working with kids).
My point here isn’t to brag.
I want to show the beauty of the
life of servitude in the Name of the Lord. It wasn’t I who minister, but Jesus
Christ who works through me. I wasn’t I who have done anything or made any
difference in these folks’ lives. Somehow, I always feel like I received much
more than I could give. There has been as much sorrow and pain as there has
been joy. But, somehow, in the midst of all, it’s worth it.
It’s worth it to see the mentally
handicapped residents laughed heartily after chasing me around the courtyard,
calling me “silly” and “crazy.” It’s worth it to see how touched an old deaf
lady was, seeing a young seminarian took the effort the sign and to reach out
to her. It’s worth it to sit in the rain with some homeless folks laughing and
cracking jokes.
I do receive more than I can give.
People often think so highly of
seminarians. No, we are far from being perfect. Not all of us have the right
intention following the Lord. Don’t be shock to find out quite a few, just like
James and John, seek to glory and honor rather than learning the life of
service.
But, time and again, the Lord would
always find his way to remind us, as he did me, that “Those who are recognized as rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them,
and their great ones make their authority over them felt. But it shall not be
so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you will be your
servant; whoever wishes to be first among you will be the slave of all.”
This vocation is to never a
stepping-stone for career ladder, nor should it be a way to gain prestige. It
has always been and will always be about service, and only in service do we
find contentment.
As a 15 year-old, I was an
ambitious brat for wanting to be a Cardinal. As a 23 year-old seminarian, I
ought to be what the world would undoubtedly define as “lacking of ambition
in every aspect of life,” for I want nothing but to remain unnoticed among the
forgotten of society. Is it a bad thing? To quite a few, maybe yes. It doesn’t quite
matter to me. In the end, what I and all of us who are following the Lord should
keep in mind is that which He himself has said today:
“The Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his
life as a ransom for many.”